Inclusive Weddings
An inclusive wedding is one that honours and respects the diverse backgrounds and identities of the couple and their guests. I am proud to welcome all clients and their guests no matter what their needs and will work with you to create an event that is inclusive of everyone. Here we look at some ideas to make your wedding ceremony more inclusive.
Venue & Caterer:
Consider accessibility for all guests including those with disabilities and having a quiet space for people to get away from the noise and lights if it all gets too much for them. Is the venue you are considering not just able to cater to people of all backgrounds and orientations but are they welcoming of them?
Does your caterer accommodate all dietary needs and preferences? If Vegan is your choice are they a plant based expert and do they use sustainable products?
The wedding party:
How diverse is your wedding party? No-one should be designing their wedding content as if it were a United Colours of Benneton poster but if you are lucky enough to count friends and family with mixed race, gender and orientations then why not ask them to get involved? Maybe encourage your guests to share their pronouns with each other on the invitations or wedding website so everyone knows that they are welcome.
Ceremony content:
Use non gendered language – Pre wedding you can be “Nearlyweds”, “Bachelorx” or “Fiance” all of which carry no specific gender identifier so can be used by male, female, or nonbinary pronoun users. Use ‘wedding party’ not ‘bridal party’. Have ‘Best People’ or ‘People of honour’, I’ve also seen ‘Bridesmates’, ‘bestgirls’, ‘flowerguys’ and ‘ring bearers’ all of which are welcome and fun as we mix up traditional roles with a modern twist.
You are not necessarily ‘bride’ or ‘groom’ but ‘partner’, ‘spouse’, ‘significant other’, ‘newlywed’ or ‘mx’ (pronounced mix) which is non gender specific, and these terms can be used in your vows.
Consider using a sign language interpreter for deaf or heard of hearing guests or make your celebrant aware that you have some guests who are hard of hearing and have them seated near the front of the ceremony.
Don’t be afraid to integrate cultural rituals in your ceremony that represent your backgrounds and identities. To those friends and family members who share that identity, it is a welcome addition and honours to their heritage, whilst other guests will love to see something different and feel included in an element that is part of a wider community and tradition.
In order to be truly inclusive and to celebrate diversity we need to not be afraid to include our identities and needs in our ceremony plans. The saying hoes “You can’t be it if you can’t see it” and whilst I don’t fully believe in this, I do feel that if people can see more of this inclusive way of being then they are not afraid to try it and embrace it in themselves. Ask questions and be curious of people, most will relish the chance to educate and support you to embrace change and if you make a mistake – apologise and move on, we are only human.
